Well I learned today that I feel even more of an outcast than I did before... My best friend Jessica was in a bad accident today, which she called me like an hour after it happened. Well she went on to tell me that she was with our friend Courtney and that they were hanging out today. I'd heard about it before but I didn't think Jessica would do it, or Courtney would at least invite me too. But no... and Jessica never mentioned anything of it after that. It was me who even ran into Courtney and got her new number and stuff. Well I hate that Jessica got in a wreck, her 2008 Kia Spectra is totaled and she just got it less than 6 months ago. Courtney I think doesn't even care that I'm her friend or not because not once has she texted me or acknowledged that I'm even on the face of this planet.
It really hurt that who I considered to be my two best friends through elementary and high school decided to go and do something pretty much behind my back and never invite me along or mention anything to me. I even texted Courtney a while back and she didn't even give me the decency of responding. Thanks so much for being my "friend".
I feel so much like an outcast at school already because NO ONE talks to me, invites me to go places or do things, and some people just treat me like dirt, which really bothers me cause I've never done anything to anyone there.
I'm definitely an outcast in my family because everyone treats me like it for once, I don't believe the same things, and I am just in general the oddball. Nothing I do is ever good enough, no matter how great I do even the biggest screw up from someone else is rewarded and everyone just looks at me like "You could do better", even when it's something as big as getting into the Nursing program. I've just come to the conclusion that I'll never be good enough for them or do anything to live up to their expectations.
It's sad that my friends are starting to treat me the same way... I have one friend that hasn't ever turned their back on me. Sadly it's the one person that can't, my boyfriend. Apparently I'm just one of those people that will always be alone. =/
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