I feel like I’m due for a really long blog entry. I’m sitting here at work, with no internet of
course :( It’s 5:30am and no where near
time to start the mundane tasks that have to be done, but can’t be until my
little boy is awake. But yesterday
Derek and I went for a drive because the other day I told him I wanted to go
somewhere and do something. This was a
great idea, we drove all the way up Little Canada, through Lake Toxaway, then
came back through Cashiers. It was a
nice quiet drive that I’ve never made before.
He’s had a lot on his mind this past week. His grandma passed away Sunday; he hid a lot
of how he felt, even from me. I think
today helped him clear his mind.
But any who, Valentine’s Day was a
week ago, and it was the first time a guy has actually done anything romantic
for me. I got all dressed up, he brought
me a dozen roses, I was shocked and very, very happy. We had originally planned to go to his house
and have a night in, but because of all the snow we had that week he decided he
wanted to go to Asheville because he was tired of being cooped up in the
house. Well that was a big mistake to do
last minute. We tried Red Lobster,
couldn’t find a parking spot. Then we
tried P.F. Chang’s, even bigger mistake because it was a 2 hour wait. Finally we decided on Asiana, which wasn’t
bad, but it wasn’t the best in the world.
After we finished eating we left and went back to his place. During all this time I got kind of upset
because I got all dressed up, which is something I NEVER do, and he didn’t even
say anything. We got back to his house
and watched Sixteen Candles, I was pretty upset by this point then we finally
talked and I told him what was bothering me.
He made me feel better then we watched Weird Science since I had never
seen it before, it definitely was weird.
It was pretty late by this point and I had to get up and go to work the
next day so he took me home. While
sitting in my driveway he finally told me everything I wanted to hear, that I
was pretty and that it was a pretty dress and that I didn’t have to get all
dressed up for him. That is one thing
that bothers me about him is that he always waits til the last minute when I
have to leave to say meaningful things or to kiss me passionately (I don’t know
how else to describe it). It always
makes me want more, and I don’t like leaving unsatisfied and wanting more.
As far as our relationship, I think
it’s going pretty well. We are still
getting to know each other, what buttons to push and not to push. What ticks each other off, which between the
both of us is a lot. Yesterday actually
made 2 months since our first date. We
definitely are taking this pretty slow, but I think it is much better than
rushing into things and complicating things by getting physical. I mean we have done everything but anything
sexual pretty much. The most we’ve done
is make out and touch each other a little.
Which I’m not really too unhappy about, it actually says to me that he
likes me for me, not just my body or what I’m willing to do with it. I am super comfortable around him, except
telling him things, but I’m like that with everyone, I like to keep most things
to myself and the best way to get me to talk about those certain kinds of
things is through writing, not talking.
I don’t think he understands that yet.
I am good with words, but a lot of times I’m uncomfortable saying them. I think this is also the first time I’ve not
fell for a guy right away, which definitely tells me that what I had in the
past was not love. I really do like
Derek, but I just don’t think I’m there yet, getting there, but not there
yet. I still get butterflies when I’m
with him though, haven’t felt those suckers in forever. :)
School I guess is going okay, I’m
not too fond of my teacher and she’s not giving me the best grades. I think it’s total BS because I’m doing the
same thing I was doing last semester when I made all A’s and she’s giving me
shitty grades for the same quality of work.
So far I’ve made a 80 on a paper, which I was not happy with at all, and
a 91 on a discussion board. Told me that
I needed to “develop my original post more”, I wrote a freaking page on the
topic she assigned which was boring as hell, I don’t know how it could get any
more developed. She also takes for
freaking ever to get things graded, which is a big pet peeve, I don’t want to
wait 2+ weeks to find out I did a shitty job on an assignment. That way I can learn what I did wrong and fix
it in time to turn in the next paper.
I’m so ready for this semester to be over with. This summer I’m not looking forward to though
because I’m taking Leadership and it’s going to be condensed and intense with
clinical added on top of that. I’m going
to talk to my advisor on Tuesday about whether or not I should take it in the
fall or summer, and when I should take my other elective course.
2 weeks and 1 day until I leave for
Scotland! I am so excited it’s not even
funny, although I am dreading it a little because that means I won’t get to see
Derek or any of my friends for a week, which also means I probably won’t get to
talk to them either. I’m taking my
laptop but it’s not a guarantee that I’ll get to use it or have internet while
I’m over there. I haven’t totally
decided what I’m going to do while I’m there.
I know that Friday I am going to meet up with Elaine, which I think I’m
going to catch a bus up to Glasgow and hang out with her there. I’m taking $1000 with me already turned into
£s and it only came to £600. What I have
left from my paychecks I’m going to load on my CPG card and take with me just
in case. Before I leave I’m going to
attempt to get my taxes done, just have to call my dad’s friend, and hopefully
I’ll have that back soon. I already have
plans for the money. $500 is going into
my emergency account to replace the funds that I took out a few months ago,
then I’m buying myself a Wii U and a few games, I’m contemplating buying a new
TV but haven’t totally decided yet, and the rest of the money is going towards
my car to get it paid off so I can start saving up for a Jeep. I’ve pretty much given up on trying to get my
own place, I have other things that are more important to worry about
first. Plus by the time I save up I
might already be asked to move in with someone else, I don’t think I could
handle living by myself. I’m also
considering getting a second job once I am through with my clinical classes, so
maybe in August. I’m just not getting
the hours I need with Bayada, and they’re not willing to let me have more of
other people’s shifts. I’m also not too
thrilled with my Arden client. I need to
get off my dad’s insurance but can’t because I’m not getting the hours I
need. Hopefully Angel or Mission will
have a full time job opening come August that I am interested in and will get
hired for. I do want to stay with my little
boy though, I want to stay with him until the end or until I can’t handle it
anymore. He stole my heart.
No comments:
Post a Comment